May's Plan B - Shenanigans Alert!

Theresa May, having stated that she will fall on her sword if MV3 passes, was rewarded with a two fingered salute from the DUP.

Following on from that, the clowns in Parliament who have "taken control" of the Brexit process have proven they are fit for nothing; as none of the indicative options put forward for a vote scored a majority.

Therefore what will May do?

May will put forward MV3, when it loses she will withdraw the whip from the Tories who voted against and call a general election.

Those without the whip can't stand as Tories, thus she in one fell swoop has purged the party of trouble makers thereby saving it to fight on another day (even if Corbyn wins the election)!

Something May, or May Not Happen Today

‘No one seems to be doing anything’ - there’s a pretty strange mood around the place https://t.co/OAULNTruDf

— Laura Kuenssberg (@bbclaurak) March 26, 2019

Be prepared for may to say absolutely nothing new when she addresses the 1922 Committee later today!

Britain's De Facto PM - Oliver Letwin

It is a quite staggering piece of mismanagement and political incompetence that Oliver Letwin - the mild-mannered, loyal insider who helped all Tory leaders past and who wanted to help this one succeed - has become the chief rebel and now the country’s effective Prime Minister pic.twitter.com/oYG58I1fYx

— George Osborne (@George_Osborne) March 26, 2019

Well, I didn't see that one coming!

The Klan Went To Chequers

2. The 'Grand Wizards' (the new name for the Chequer's daytrippers apparently) also had another meeting this morning, were they discussed again whether they could get on board to back PM's deal and there was no firm conclusion

— Laura Kuenssberg (@bbclaurak) March 25, 2019

The Coup That Wasn't

Yesterday's damp squid of a non coup may in fact be the precursor for some shenanigans this week that sees May go, or it may in fact be nothing at all!

The End of May To Come Early This Year!

EXCLUSIVE:

Sir Graham Brady, head of 1922 committee, told PM on Monday that Tory MPs want her to quit over Brexit during meeting in No 10

He told her a growing number of MPs think the time has come for her to go amid fury over A50 extensionhttps://t.co/Wj5IMADUN0

— Steven Swinford (@Steven_Swinford) March 21, 2019

The Address To The Nation That Wasn't

Those of us who could be bothered to interrupt our normal TV schedules of Coronation Street etc last night, in order to watch Theresa May's "Address To The Nation", were somewhat underwhelmed.

She said nothing new and instead squandered the opportunity to lay out a plan or even issue a threat, by simply blaming everyone in Parliament for this clusterfuck.

Not a clever move in my humble opinion!

May The Untrustworthy

Here's cast from last night's meeting of ministers opposing long Brexit delay:

Andrea Leadsom
Penny Mordaunt
Michael Gove
Jeremy Hunt
Sajid Javid
Chris Grayling
Liam Fox
Liz Truss

They're seeing PM shortly

Despite No 10 saying delay will be short they're reserving judgement

— Steven Swinford (@Steven_Swinford) March 20, 2019

Ministers want to see the letter

Despite No 10's assurances that the PM is asking for a short delay, there are concerns that there could be a caveat paving way to a longer delay

— Steven Swinford (@Steven_Swinford) March 20, 2019

It is ironic that church going vicar's daughter is so untrusted by everyone.

For what it's worth I don't trust her either!

Labour's "Necessary" Cleansing

Shadow Scotland Minister Paul Sweeney Says Labour Defections Were "Necessary Cleansing" https://t.co/GoyS62kvIB pic.twitter.com/PT5DfgBTi3

— Guido Fawkes (@GuidoFawkes) March 18, 2019

Farage Is a Spiv - It's As Simple As That!

Nigel Farage is coming to Hull - and you can eat a meal with him

But Farage supporters will have to fork out £220 if they want a "Gold Ticket" to attend what is being billed as "An Evening with Nigel Farage"

https://t.co/vey7xG7zu9

— Mike#FBPE (@mikeymike1) March 17, 2019

Cable To Stand Down - No One Will Notice

#VinceCable will stand down as Liberal Democrat leader .

But will anybody notice?

— Bruce Woodacre (@bruce_bwkm) March 14, 2019

Cox's Codpiece

All eyes currently on Geoffrey Cox, who is telling the Commons that he is 'unable to talk about' his negotiations

Geoffrey Cox jokes that it has become known as 'Cox's codpiece'

Says he is trying to ensure that 'what's inside the codpiece is in full working order'

— Steven Swinford (@Steven_Swinford) March 7, 2019

Labour are as Shit as The Tories

Equalities and Human Rights Commission announces it believes Labour might have broken the law by unlawfully discriminating against Jewish people - so ‘considering using statutory enforcement powers’ - party now has chance to respond - v serious indeed

— Laura Kuenssberg (@bbclaurak) March 7, 2019

Absolutely Everything Is Going To Be Shit!

Meanwhile in London, ministers begin to panic and predict “a party meltdown nationwide” if PM's deal falls next week. Brexiteer minister: "If we lose on Tuesday, absolutely everything is going to be shit".

— Tom Newton Dunn (@tnewtondunn) March 6, 2019

Momentum Fined

Momentum fined for 'multiple breaches' of electoral law https://t.co/4SJMxvBPhp

— Andrew (@ataccounting) March 6, 2019

Pearl Clasping Vicars' Daughters

Having observed the experiment for more than long enough, I think it fair to say that pearl clasping vicar's daughters should not seek, or be granted, high political office.

Failing Grayling Featured In New York Times

Two thirds of a page in today’s New York Times dedicated to a report on “Failing Grayling”. pic.twitter.com/jQHf2iayre

— Ben Riley-Smith (@benrileysmith) March 4, 2019